Tough choices....and the choices that follow

Today in my book i read about how the main character of my book was faced with a really tough decision, finally made up his mind and ended up constantly second guessing himself later on. I do this A LOT and about pretty much anything. I hate life's uncertainty. You make a decision now and you know it always has the chance for it to come back to bite you later. I wish there was a button in life that let you see the end result of your life whenever you needed to know that it would all be okay in the end. I worry about the college i'll attend, my career choice, future wife, number of kids, how ill raise those kids etc....it gets to be overwhelming. By the time i finish thinking about it all, i feel like my entire life is beating down on my shoulders with no chance at rubbing it off anytime soon. Sometimes i wonder if my saying yes or no to a simple question will completely alter my life path. And i know we're all told god knows what you're going to choose before you choose but how? it doesn't make sense, and maybe it's not supposed to, but i cant help but feel like i need to be weary with everything and everyone, a sort of sense of paranoia but not necessarily that someone is going to hurt me, but that i'm going to hurt my self with a simple choice i make. Maybe that's why i feel like i can't trust other people, because i don't even feel like i can trust myself. I find it hard to put my total devotion into one person or one thing, whether it's due to a fear of being heartbroken, not good enough, deceived, or any other of the possible things that could go wrong....now this, i admit, is a sense of paranoia. I never seem to thoroughly enjoy life if i don't have something to look forward to, whether it be hanging out with a special someone, seeing family, hanging out with old friends or anything of that nature really. Without having that thing to look forward to, it's like i'm watching a youtube video but instead of it moving to another after one is finished, i'm stuck pressing the replay button over and over again, a never ending, monotonous cycle. i'm so close to finally being out in the world all on my own, but i realize that i've got a lot of growing up to do yet. Getting over my insecurities and just being able to be myself without worrying what others think being at the top of the list. how am i supposed to be able to trust others until i can trust the guy in my skin first?